Parenting is always a challenging job. As we swing into a less structured summer and navigate the new norms of social distancing, though, caregivers are presented with more challenges this summer than those before. Without the usual summer camps and classes, how can we structure children’s days and continue our own work? With some families returning to playdates and sleepovers, how can we ensure both the safety and happiness of our own kids? Read on for tips on how to address these new challenges this summer.

Structuring Summer Days

Now that virtual learning is complete and we’ve all taken a breather, it’s clear to see that this summer will look very different from those past. While all families spend their summer days differently, many sign up for camps or group activities to structure summer days and keep children active and engaged. Many of our beloved camps are closed for the summer, so where do we go from here? Children thrive on structure and routine, and this season will require from caregivers more planning and thought (and gentleness with ourselves).

• Schedule virtual activities:

  There are now many virtual versions of the activities our children love. Some of these are paid, while others are donation-based, which can give greater access to us all this summer. Even having one or two short scheduled virtual classes, lessons, or activities per week can act as anchors to your child’s week, providing greater structure and sense of time. There is no shortage of activities with kids’ yoga, art classes, story hours, math camps, music shows, and more led by qualified educators. Here are two examples if you are looking for ideas:

  • Breathe & Learn free Zoom yoga classes for kids 

  • “$6 Story Time With Ms. Ross”

• Use a daily planner:

  Whether your child is comfortable writing in a planner or even just drawing pictures, a daily planner can be a great addition to your summer. Help foster excitement and ownership by allowing your child to personalize and decorate the front cover, or even having a special pen to accompany the planner. Each night or morning, set aside 5 minutes to go over the day’s plan with your child. Just as teachers go over the agenda with students for their benefit, you can go over the plan for your day with your child to help them feel structured. Better Kids has our own daily planner template available for free for you to download. You can print multiple and staple into a booklet, or slip one into a plastic cover to reuse each day!

• Keep a consistent bedtime:

  Daylight hours have been extended and children have fewer constraints on their schedules now than during the school year. It can be easy to let bedtimes slip later, but try to stick to old routines and times to keep your household running smoothly. Summer is a great time for kids to catch up on rest, but avoid letting both bedtimes and wake up times slip much later. To help with keeping these structures, be thoughtful about your household meal times. By eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner at similar times over summer as during the academic year, your child’s body will better stay on its biological clock for sleeping and waking. 

• Build in new habits:

  This summer can be a great time to think about the positive and healthy habits our children build. While the first week or two will require more adult support and reminders, children build habits quickly and will then show greater independence on their own. Perhaps you want your child to build the habit of reading a book each morning after breakfast (check out our SEL book list and even tack on a daily kids’ book review form!). Or maybe you’d like to build in certain chores each week and develop a fun way for kids to mark their progress. We at Better Kids are personally excited about our new Summer SEL workbook and love how it can add structure to this summer with a beautiful SEL daily calendar template! Ask your child, too, what things they enjoy doing and incorporate daily habits together. These SEL skills and habits will not only greatly benefit your child this summer, but make for a strong and smooth transition into a very different looking school year. 

• Schedule virtual playdates:

  Do you know of other caregivers also looking to add more structure to their summer days? Team up and schedule a daily, virtual playdate for your kids. This can again provide structure and routine to your child’s day, as well as something fun for your child to look forward to! Plus, encouraging children’s social interactions while we are all apart is important for their social emotional growth. 

Supporting Children’s Friendships

Virtual playdates can be great, but what about when other families begin to feel comfortable again with in-person interactions? This is a time when you should unapologetically prioritize your own boundaries and comfort levels. Do what is right for you and your family (while still ensuring the safety of those around you), which may look a little different for everyone. While navigating within your own boundaries and comfort zone, here are some things to consider.

• Seeing friends in person:

  If you have decided to allow your child to see friends in person, it is crucial to clearly communicate boundaries beforehand. Will all activities take place outdoors only? Will the children and adults all stay 6 feet apart? Will everyone be wearing masks? Be clear and open about your own expectations and also ask about the expectations of others involved. By discussing these questions beforehand, you can avoid unknowingly crossing others’ safety boundaries or having others do so to yours.

• Seeing friends virtually:

  If you have decided to not gather with others, you can still get creative! Help your child mail letters, deliver hand-made gifts, make videos/movies for friends, or even host movie watching parties (with the help of Facetime or Netflix Party). When staying safe at home, we can still continue to strengthen friendships from afar.

• Including our children in the process:

  It can seem unfair to children who watch as their friends return to playdates as normal, while they stay at home. Throughout all of these conversations and decisions, include your children. Kids often respond well to honesty, transparency, and facts. If you’ve decided not to gather with others, allow your child to listen to articles or to look at resources you’ve used in your decision. Explore the nuances of the situation together, carefully listen to one another, and invite them to understand your decision. 

While navigating these situations, always think about your own family and its health. Others may be less cautious or more comfortable with closer interactions, but stay within your own comfort boundaries and do not feel you need to apologize for this. Whether you are exploring safe in-person activities or getting creative at home, we are all in this together!

This summer is one like no other we have experienced in our lives. While we care for our children, may we also be gentle and understanding with ourselves, remembering that we will have some challenging days that require our faith, patience, and forgiveness. Celebrate the small victories and cherish the love-filled moments this summer, as we all do what is best for the health and wellbeing of ourselves and others.